The "Review my Campaign" thread

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  • Morrinn
    Morrinn
    Posts: 166
    I've been meaning to tackle the requests for a review, but really haven't found the time. Now that I have it, my net is being cute with me.
    Once I'm good, I'll take a proper look at STLN. I'd hit up Kett'les campaign too, but I think Garaan covered just about all I remember from looking at it.
    Image stretchyness is a big pet peeve of mine, and easily avoidable with a proper image manipulation tool. If you dont have Photoshop, hit up GIMP instead. Wonderful (Free!) program.
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Ok, so I guess I will jump into Sommerset's "Lodestar":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/airship-lodestar campaign.
    This one is a tough one, personally, as this was one of the first campaigns I ever favorited, but here goes:
    I, like Gaaran, start at adventure logs. This campaign has some of the best logs around. I fell in love with little Talitha a long time ago.... sorry, getting sidetracked. The logs are great, but not consistent. For instance, there was a recent break from 8/11- 10/31. Just me wishing there was more reading material, because it is so good.
    Start Page: While the background is kind of bland, the banner and the page have always been one of my favorites. It draws you in by not telling you much, yet has an undeniable pull.
    Wiki: I love the main images, and there is good consistency there. After that it is pretty bland however, but mostly informative. The "what the heck" is a great idea, but needs fleshing out.
    Overall: I will always have a soft spot for this campaign. I visit it every couple of weeks to see if there is a new adventure log, hoping... The opening graphics and appearance is great, but need to follow it more down the line.
    Hope this helps Sommerset- always a fan...

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    Duskreign's "COTM for November":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Sommerset
    Sommerset
    Posts: 32
    Thanks for the props, killervp. Yeah, we did have a nasty gap in the Adventure Logs -- real world stuff waylaid me and my players pretty heavily for a while. But the forums were still going strong during that time, often we get caught up in the current adventure on the forums and neglect to record anything on the wiki or adventure logs.

    Wiki: Ha, guilty as charged. I had intended for the "What the Heck?" page to be a lot more fluid, with players posting questions, that I could put succinct answers in a handy spot. But, it never quite took off. I may remove it from the main page until we have time to actually do something with it. Same deal with the wiki. We're so busy creating content on the forums, locations, characters, little bits of history -- and it all grows fluidly throughout the day, it can really be a chore to catalog everthing into the wiki. So consider my wrists slapped.

    We're on hiatus until the middle of December. [I'm directing a show in town, plus normal holiday scheduling problems] So after that, I'll crack the whip a bit on myself, and try to improve more of the wiki pages.

    Thanks again!
  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585 edited November 2011
    I am going to be very critical in any appraisals I give. I do this because if we all give positive feedback all the time, then those we give feedback to only get to feel good and really learn nothing. I hope these thoughts help make your page become one of the greats.

    Now onto Rase Cidraen's

    "Dark Queen of the West":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/the-dark-queen-of-the-west

    h6. The Layout

    I love the overall feel of this page but th layout is killing me as it doesnt sink with my browser. For example on the Adventure log page the character images appear to the right of the IPhone not on the IPhone screen. Most of the other pages line up just fine so I imagine this is a coding error on that page. The use of the IPHone was a nice touch. Took a moment to figure out to use the slide bar for the WIKI but beyond that worked great. Other pages not properly aligned include the calander, Players, and Characters. Alot of the adventure logs do not line up good also.

    h6. The Fluff

    The content is good and informative but a few points in the pages were annoying. For instance, instead of connecting to so many different web sites for source, I would prefer to see infor cut and pasted into your format. I know alot of work but would make the site flow more freely. Ultimatetly, when you redirect to another page you loose the feel of your own. Their formatting is different and it kills some of the glamour of your campaign. Also it took a ten minutes to figure out what the purpose of the site was. At first I though it was a Wierd West campaign set in moddern day, then I thought World of Darkness, and ultimately it wasnt until I looked at the characters that I realized it was WOD. I am loving the story elements and had I found something like this a year ago, I would have mined it for the WOD campaign I am in right now but alas, that campaign is ending in the next few of weeks. I could see using alot of this stuff in Delta Green or Conspiracy X.

    h6. The Art

    The art is excellent and consistant. It fills the few voids I found in the page and makes me want to dig deeper.

    h6. Overall Feeling

    If the few complaints I made are taken care of I feel this page would be one of the better pages I have found in the sense of creativity and story. Your use of props is awesome and though the page seems to be missing a few key pieces it is still a very useful resource for other GM's to borrow from. Keep working on it. You have something real good going, it just needs a little polish. Also I use an odd browser and some of the problems I mentioned may only apply to Maxthon and not IE, Google Crome, or others out there.

    -Steve
    "Star Trek Late Night":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/star-trek-late-night
    Post edited by gaaran on
  • gaaran
    gaaran
    Posts: 740
    Hey SW, I apologize for the graphical errors in DQotW. I've never even heard of Maxthon, but I have tested the layout in IE, Firefox, Chrome and Safari, and it works just fine. We are currently in the process of converting everything into the phone format (but it's a long process). I'm curious, which websites are you referring to for sources? I only ask, because if you're referring to "The Organizations Page":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/the-dark-queen-of-the-west/wikis/organizations those are all fake links that connect to wiki pages. Just wanted to give it an authentic feel :).

    Thanks for the feedback guys, on Dark Queen of the West, Rase and I have been putting in a lot of work to standardize everything on the site, so in the coming weeks, it should be finished and polished :).
  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585
    Haa, I didnt even click on them when I saw the web page listed below them. On so many other pages I have hit links to outside pages and it kills the whole thing for me. Now I have looked and nicely done.
  • gaaran
    gaaran
    Posts: 740
    Haha, I suppose I should take it as a compliment that it looked so real ;).
  • wmoomaw
    wmoomaw
    Posts: 13
    Awesome! Reading the critiques of other people's wikis will help me with mine! If anyone would like to review my wiki I would love it!
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    A link to your "campaign":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/imperiumandwyld is recommended, wmoomaw.
    Will try and get to it soon.
    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    Duskreign's "COTM for November":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585
    killervp has been one of the few people I have talked to alot on OP. He asked for an honest opinion of his page and here it is. Hope that my opinions help you find the perfection you are seeking.

    "A God Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt

    h6. The Layout

    Other than the occassional browser conflict, I love the layout. Easy to use, intuitive, and well thought out. The adventure log has been streamlined and allows an easy progression for the stories. I picked up reading this site about three months ago and the recent changes have improved the site very much. I found the adventure log is missing an image, that was annoying. I hate seeing the "X" floating on the page. The regions tab is perfect, Love the setup and the map at the begining is beautiful. The performers tab is good but it is missing something. I can put a finger on it but something feels off about the layout. With the rest of the site having such nice graphics to compliment things, I think that may be the problem. The page just doesnt grab me like the rest of the site does. Overall, a pretty clean site with a decent layout.

    h6. The Fluff

    Awesome story that continues to get better from month to month. The details and information on the site are very complete and make me desire to read more. The information your players post is a great addition. Getting different writing styles and perspectives always makes a page glow with amazingness. I miss the video at the start, I thought that was a nice touch and a better opening to the site as a whole.

    h6. The Art

    Intitially I was not happy with the banner but the recent change made the page seem much more professional. The art is hit or miss. I prefer to see the majority of the art on a page to be the same style. You have actual images, anime, comicbook?, and fantasy artwork. I would streamline things and pull it all together as one or two types of art. Your player images on the opening page is very distracting. I like the layout but the combinations of different styles is rather hard on the eyes.

    h6. Overall Feeling

    This is my second favorite campaign on OP. Only one other beats you out. I come back to this page at least once a week and check it out. I even print off adventure logs and use them for bathroom reading. I would give you an 8 out of 10 for the page.

    -Steve
    "Star Trek Late Night":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/star-trek-late-night
  • wmoomaw
    wmoomaw
    Posts: 13
    Awesome. Good point about the artwork on your last review. It would be nice to have the artistic talent to create all fresh artwork in a uniformed style for sites.
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Thanks for the review Steve!! It really helps a lot! The original video was taken down when Obsidian was attacked by the video bug. Some of my players are actually in the process of doing their own portraits of the player characters, so eventually the start page will have a more consistent look. Here is an "example":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/a-god-rebuilt/wikis/player-art.
    Morrinn- Have fixed most of the inconsistent backgrounds, and have gone with only 2, the hieroglyphs and the ankh. Thanks again for all the feedback! Always looking for more reviews (hint...gaaran) from anyone, as it truly helps!!

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    Duskreign's "COTM for November":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • HurstGM
    HurstGM
    Posts: 205 edited November 2011
    OK im down as well. You can do any of them (save the private one its not ready), but I would prefer the review of "Uss Sanctuary":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/uss-sanctuary
    Post edited by HurstGM on
  • FrankSirmarco
    FrankSirmarco
    Posts: 250
    I'm game, Morrinn. "Here":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/cthulhusupremusest you go.
  • HurstGM
    HurstGM
    Posts: 205
    WOW frank yours is really slick looking! The backgrounds are all seamless or at least it seems so. How did you do that? I would also love to know your editing software for the opening video. I love the what appears to be authentic records repurposed for the game it self. One of the best ive ever seen.
  • FrankSirmarco
    FrankSirmarco
    Posts: 250
    Thanks, Hurst! To answer your question, I read through the FAQ constantly, and played around with code until I got the desired effect. I'd love to tell you there was a method to my madness, but that would imply that I knew what I was doing. As for the licenses and other records I use on the site, I did very thorough searches on Google for 1920's-related items and either recreated or revised them in Photoshop. The video was created using Windows Movie Maker.
  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585
    Frank, yours was the first campaign I looked at on OP and it was the one that convinced me we could do something good with this site. I love CoC and anything Lovecraftian and though I havent done a review for you yet I will say this. One of the best pages on OP for maintaining the theme and mood of the genre. Fabulous work.

    -Steve
    "Star Trek Late Night":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/star-trek-late-night
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876 edited November 2011
    Ok, Frank, but this one is hard, as it has always been a campaign I strive for, not pick apart.

    "Cthulhu Supremus Est":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/cthulhusupremusest
    Start Page- This campaign opens with immersion. Where some of us scream out "Look at Me, Look at This" CSE starts with a newspaper!! It is ingenious. The little touches, such as the Cthulhu logos in the corners, are phenomenal. The sidebar is unobtrusive, and fits seamlessly in. My only complaint on the opening page is the headline says it is set in NYC, but later talks about adventures in Chicago. Perhaps my only other complaint is the standard graveyard background... almost fits, but not quite. The video is beautiful, and fits in with the mood. Overall, my favorite start page, along with Arsheesh's "original":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/age-of-legends on the portal.
    Adventure Logs- They are enormously informative, and you can follow the story. Actually, I have only 2 complaints. One is personal- get off hiatus!! I miss reading these, and looking forward to new ones. Second, I would set them up on a wiki, so the real world does not intrude into your 1920's one. I assume the gm writes them, correct? See if you can get the players to write them from their point of view- it will make it even more immersive, although not as consistent.
    Wiki- What it should be- Chock full of info. While the main page could use a little clean-up (you already have a link on the start page to link to the investigators, and the pic links are inconsistent with the rest) the info available through the sidebar. From rewards systems (mythos points, very cool) to factual accounts of forensics, the city of New York, and others, this is a very full, informative wiki. While lacking in visual appeal, it goes the distance in info.
    Characters- Wish your characters had more on their bios...
    Maps- Continues the mood, complete with pins.
    Overall- You have to nitpick to find things wrong. Easily one of the best sites on the Portal.

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    Duskreign's "COTM for November":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011
    Post edited by GamingMegaverse on

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • ketherian
    ketherian
    Posts: 203 edited November 2011
    Greetings all.
    I'd appreciate someone reviewing my pathfinder campaign: "Rise of the Runelords":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/rotrllegacy
    One particular player writes the adventure log. He's also provided the PC portraits. He is always asking for feedback and unfortunately gets very little; so anything you can provide him I will happily forward.

    In return, I will try to review the next link posted.
    Post edited by ketherian on
  • Leonidas300
    Leonidas300
    Posts: 268 edited November 2011
    Hello all.

    I
    Post edited by Leonidas300 on
  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585
    "here is the link":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/metzger

    on the forums type it like this:

    =="here is the link":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/metzger==
  • Leonidas300
    Leonidas300
    Posts: 268 edited November 2011
    thanks
    Post edited by Leonidas300 on
  • Leonidas300
    Leonidas300
    Posts: 268
    Thanks


    "A Manifestation of Chaos":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/metzger
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Here is a review of Ketherian's "Rise of the Rune Lords":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/rotrllegacy
    As always, this is an opinion, and I offer this to help him and others, but I am by far not claiming a right to do so, or saying that my own campaign is better.

    Start page: I like the banner, and the continuation of the stars as o's, but would recommend a little tweak, as the o in Lords is off-center compared to the o in of. Like the 1st pick, but would drop the dice bag- takes away from the immersion into a new world. Also would recommend a background throughout- check out Arsheesh's great one "here":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/age-of-legends or most of the top rated campaigns.

    Adventure Log: Please, please move your picks onsite using the image library!!!! Most people will not wait that long for images to load!! The pictures themselves are great, although I see no credits to the artists. I especially loved the pic of Magnimar. I really suggest having links in the logs to characters, items, places, etc. The logs are informative, and create a good picture, but without links no one on the outside can find out more easily- and therefore most will give up.

    Wiki: The sidebar is fine, but you should wait until links are complete to put them in the sidebar. Incomplete links leading to errors is a major pet peeve of mine and others. The formatting needs work, and the opening sentence- well, it needs help. The Hinterlands map leads to nowhere. The rule page is great, as is the xp page. You have a number of pages that list Magnimar as Magnamar, and therefore goes to error. The calendar is a great idea!! You need some formatting help, and obviously catching up, but I love the idea.

    Characters: Love the circle pics and the bios on the PCs are good. I really like the set pieces. My only complaint would be consistency in format. By far the best part of this campaign.

    Overall a great start. You just have a lot of work to do to catch up on the obviously rich world you are playing in!

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    Duskreign's "COTM for November":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    It is true, Stephen and I chat a bit, but I somehow missed his request for a review, and since Morrinn & Gaaran seem busy with holiday madness, I will take a stab. As you said, perhaps I can help you achieve the "perfection" you desire.

    "Star Trek Late Night":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/star-trek-late-night

    Start Page: I am hoping that you cut down on some of the clutter. The original page, with the sidebar and the What If statements, and if you add the video, would be enough (would also keep the coveted Dusk endorsement) Leave the rules and extras on a later page. The concept is still so brilliant- one of those "How come I didn't think of that" moments. The video is a good addition, just needs some cleaning up (as do my own).

    Adventure Logs: STLN has not started yet.... so it is not right to comment on something that is not there yet... I personally cannot wait.

    Home/Main Wiki: Wow, what can I say? There is more detail here than campaigns that are 3 years old on the Portal. STLN is a rich, rich world. The pics for each link, like having a Ceylon for Droids, is well thought out and some are downright funny. Rumors has 2 pics, does that make them doubly important? There are lines in here that elicit chuckles and some downright belly laughs. One of my recent favorites is St. Jonah

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Brandonsweet
    Brandonsweet
    Posts: 13
    Great thread! Do your worst: "Honour Among Thieves":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/honour-among-thieves
  • Morrinn
    Morrinn
    Posts: 166
    Hey guys. Sorry for orphaning this thread for so long, but, you know... Busy season and all.
    Firstly, thanks to those who covered for me, I hope continue to help critique submissions, and sorry for those whom I have neglected to look at. I particularly wanted to review Ketherian's Rise of the Runelords campaign (take that as you will).

    I'll get back on this horse as soon as time permits, promise.
  • Baalshamon
    Baalshamon
    Posts: 585
    killervp, thanks for the review. I havent found a good background to put behind the text that wont distract from the text. Soon I hope I can.

    The clutter will be cleaned up once the campaign begins which is on January 7. Hopefully the logs will be to your liking.

    I truly appreciate the feedback. Every comment helps me make this a better page.

    -Steve
  • Pils
    Pils
    Posts: 149
    Hi,

    If you have time, I would be pleased you dissect my "Dark Sun A Trova":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/dark-sun-a-trova campaign !

    Even if it's in french, I think you could help me to make it better looking !

    -Pils

    Dark Sun ● La Décade des Héros : Face the Fire of the Dark Sun... a World ravaged by Sorcery! (CotM - Dec 2012)

    Les Royaumes Oubliés : A D&D 5e old school style Forgotten Realms campaign!

    (And I'm so soooorry for my poor english...)

  • DungeonMasterLoki
    DungeonMasterLoki
    Posts: 297
    Hey! I'm back in the mix and almost unpacked from my move back home to New Orleans, and what do I find but this lovely little thread waiting for m upon my return.

    I've got two, please critique honestly and don't go easy on them. Can't make them better if I don't find the flaws.

    Anyway first up is my new campaign here in NOLA, "Ad Astra Per Aspera":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/adastra which should be starting off in mid January. It's from scratch and I'm still adding/tweaking but it's ready for a soft launch.

    Then there is my three year old game from Cincinnati "The Spelljoined":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/spelljoined which is currently on hiatus but will be resuming as a monthly online game played over Google+ Hangouts, possibly this month. (Never fear, the journals of Kenari _*will*_ continue1)

    As always I must give multiple metric tonnes of credit to "Kenari Sanura":http://www.obsidianportal.com/profile/Kenari_Sanura/ and "Gwynneth Ravenscraft":http://www.obsidianportal.com/profile/GwynethRavenscraft who created most of the visual art!

    Now, bring it! (I'll start reviewing others as soon as I have gotten a bit more settled. Promise.)

    Planejammer Panopticon: Central Hub for the Planejammer Campaign Series

    Current Active Games:

    Planejammer: Catch My Drift! (Starfinder RPG)

    Planejammer: The Spelljoined (Pathfinder RPG) Campaign of the Year 2011

     

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