The "Review my Campaign" thread

145791033

Comments

  • HurstGM
    HurstGM
    Posts: 205 edited February 2012
    Glad to hear it. I (ok someone I work with) figured it was not my ability but my process that needed to bw changed. Anyway at least I know it can be better.
    Also as a side note i did add a guest book so more comments could be left.
    Post edited by HurstGM on
  • shig
    shig
    Posts: 2
    I'm curious as to what you guys think about my first ever homebrew campaign (I'm rather tired of playing out pre-written story arcs.) I'm looking for real constructive criticism here, but do keep in mind that most of this is still a work in progress.


    The story will occur almost in its entirety within my city of Greyfall.

    "Kovosa":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/kovosa


    Disclaimer: I heavily borrow from other sources for ideas and artwork. I am basically mixing together many of my favorite rpg elements from various sources, and tying them together with many of my own ideas.
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Review of Shig's "Kovosa":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/kovosa As always, just my opinion.

    Start Page- Great Start!! Good banner, good main pic! I like the fact that you hit the pic and go to the main page- nice touch.
    Adventure Logs- No logs yet.
    Wiki- Great main wiki organization. Tight, attractive, and easy to navigate. However, you do not carry the theme. The first page (main wiki page) is gorgeous, but then you move into a traditional, almost graph-like presentation. Stay with the original theme- it makes your wiki unique. There is, however, a lot of great info- much meat!! The third level goes back to the original feel, so I would just change the 2nd level.
    Characters- No characters yet.
    Overall- Wow, this is an awesome start! Added to my faves to check in later. Would suggest going Ascendent to add a good background. Good Luck, and thanks for sharing!

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Alias
    Alias
    Posts: 10
    Kosova looks great. Always cool to see how others are using this system.
    I like the link set ups on the home page. It is easy to use and not cluttered. The use of shields for the nations is a good idea too. In the small world of game design I have to note that my world Eralfast has a kingdom also called Elysia. (Or close to that: ours is spelled - Aellysia. usually.)
    So naturally I read all about Elysia in Kosova. I like how you are giving us a snap shot of the general lay of the land, the politics, intrigues, etc...
    I added you as a 'fav' also and plan to continue watching your setting expand. As always, thanks for sharing!
    - Alias
  • Alias
    Alias
    Posts: 10
    [[Eralfast]] continues to seek feedback also. Discovered you can place 'maps' as a general picture. Still should upgrade one of these days. My pal is a graphic designer and the Jerlon city map looks pretty cool in my book, despite some spelling issues we need to clean up (ha ha)! Why is it the super geek programmer graphic artist types can run circles around a computer but can't seem to spell? ! (Gotta love 'em)
    - Alias
  • Alias
    Alias
    Posts: 10
    ? how do you post with the link showing in blue? .. thanks ...
  • shig
    shig
    Posts: 2 edited February 2012
    Alias:

    Regarding your link issue - First, make sure that your comment is formatted as Textile (select the radial button under the comment box). Second, the format to link is a little different than you would use within your own wiki.

    It should be: Eralfast* :http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/eralfast/wikis/eralfast-main-page

    * I added an unnecessary space here so you could observe the syntax without it creating a link. Hope this helps!


    Also, regarding your campaign. I just got home, so I've only just given it a cursory glance but I like what I've seen so far. Your banner image is pretty cool. I can't comment on too much of the content, as it appears you are still writing most of it, but the layout is clean and functional. I'll make sure to keep up with it as you update.

    Thanks for the positive comments, as well. I still have a lot of work to do, but I hope to begin playing my campaign sometime next month. (My players are beyond restless!)




    killervp:

    Thanks for taking the time to review my campaign. I see what you mean about the 2nd level of my wiki pages, but I honestly can't imagine how to change it in a way that would allow more character without sacrificing functionality. I'm trying to allow most of the necessary information for my PCs to understand the basics of each nation, deity, etc. in a quick, easy to follow format, and I basically copied WOTC's deity tables verbatim (supplanting their campaign setting info for my own, obviously.) I would be interested in possibly creating a graphic to better present the myriad of information on each of these pages, but that most likely won't happen until I've finished with all the core pages.

    As for ascendancy goes, I'm debating it. I would love to support the site monetarily, but I'm not sure how necessary most of the Ascendant features will be for my campaign. We still meet face-to-face and I have most of the campaign info outside of Obsidian Portal. I'm using the site mostly for its wiki pages (I love that I can create GM only notes and pages online - I sometimes run a 2nd DM to allow for larger parties of PCs.)


    Again, thanks for all the advice guys. I look forward to much increased activity within this site's community.
    Post edited by shig on
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Review of Alias' "Eralfast":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/eralfast As always, just my opinion.

    Start Page- Good banner, but having a Don Dixon painting as your first pic always gets me! (The greek ruins is a Dixon). Good poetry as well. Would drop everything after the main page link into the wiki. Might I also suggest a custom nav banner and/or buttons.
    Adventure Logs- No logs yet.
    Wiki- Nothing here screams search me- No custom layout, no background... Would suggest jazzing it up. Tons of dead links (a personal pet peeve). However, some of the stuff is very good- I like the black guard, and I like the possibilities in Shrindell.
    Characters- No characters yet.
    Overall- A good start. Look at the high-ranking campaigns for ideas, and use the FAQ in the forums. Most gms will gladly share how to add touches, if you ask nicely. Good Luck!

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132
    Regarding "Kosova":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/kovosa/wikis/metal

    I'm afraid this review will have to be relatively brief, there may be much more to comment on, and I fully intend to further review the campaign in the future. A few notes for now though:

    1 - as killer noted, excellent imagery and structure! I'll also second the appreciative comments on attention to detail, with a side-order of "more, please."

    2 - I bring this up only because you've distinguished between pages under construction and finished pages: I can't seem to find any pages regarding general history, lore, etc.; such should be near the fore-front.

    3 - You reference things such as the Uzziel(?) Hordes, but with no direct link to a relevant page; try to wikify just a bit more. If you don't like having too many links (and over-linking _is_ a poor choice), you could try something similar to what "arsheesh did":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/age-of-legends/wikis/site-navigation. Note, my browser isn't properly displaying the page, resulting in a peculiar hole; you may experience something similar (2/12/12).

    4 - There is one spot I found where I must raise a bit of a stink; and that's the "Metal Domain page":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/kovosa/wikis/metal; namely the acid resistance ability, which is completely inconsistent with normal, and even standard fantasy paradigms (which tend to exaggerate the norm). While it is believable for such an ability to be associated with the Earth Domain (even if they've bought into the Joker's stone-eating-acid from Tim Burton's "Batman" - not to in any way say, of course, that your world should conform to modern scientific paradigms). I would caution against such things that can undermine that quintessential suspension-of-disbelief that we so often seek.

    5 - There is at least one broken link that I found on "Elion's page":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/kovosa/wikis/elion.

    6 - I couldn't find a good view of the world map (which is the only map I found and looks really awesome); I'd recommend uploading it to the maps tab if it's your only map; I believe non-ascended members get 1 free map that doesn't count against the normal storage limit, and the built-in map viewer may provide a better view of the map.

    7 - I'd be very much interested as to where you got your artwork, as I'm sure many are, but I could find no acknowledgements.

    8 - The system you're using isn't readily clear; normally OP lists it near the top, but your banner (also awesome) seems to cover that up; consider placing an early indication of the game system used, perhaps the Intro Page (i.e. Home Page) as a tag-line - excellent introduction by the way!

    Overall, I very much like the site, and look forward to delving into it much more; I especially look forward to what your plans are for as-of-yet under construction pages.

    Hope this helps!
    -Beaumains
  • Edward_D
    Edward_D
    Posts: 7
    For your perusal. I'm still working on importing details about the Warhammer World. But my primary focus has been making sure it is well organized. As a consequence I recently changed the rumors and Threats links so they need to be fixed. Otherwise hammer away!

    "Tales of the Empire":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/tales_of_the_empire_sac

    Thanks in Advance
  • JaymesBolton
    JaymesBolton
    Posts: 278
    Ok I think I am finally ready to allow my site to be graded. As a note the images currently being used as the links on the main page of the wiki are being edited as soon as I can get some free time to sit down and fix them. The ones there are to see if I could actually accomplish what I wanted to do. So here we go:

    "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history
    -Jaymes

    "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history
  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132 edited February 2012
    Regarding "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history

    I'm honestly not as big a fan of oriental settings as I'd like to be. That said, I found this one to be one of the best campaigns posted on this thread, and wouldn't be surprised if it got nominated.

    Because I don't have the background I'd like to in reviewing this sort of setting, I'll have to keep my comments more generic.

    1 - the imagery and styling is amazing and very well done, but I can't readily find citations for them, which I find that most people generally appreciate.

    1b - you apparently wanted to have sound, but it doesn't seem to be working. IE, FireFox, and Chrome are probably going to bethe most frequently used browsers to view your site, so it will pay to make sure everything works across all platforms.

    2 - the depth and richness are astounding (at least from a laymen's perspective), but what I'd really like to have seen was more citations. It looks like a lot of material comes from traditional (or other prior) sources, and it would be great to know for sure what comes from where. This seems to be more of an issue with text material; it looks like Japanese or Chinese (or other asian) literature has been referenced, and it's not easy to make those connections. It's also great to see what your influences were, and where your material came from. Oh, if you can, add an obvious, direct, in-page link from the Home Page to the Main Page, since it would be overkill to add everything from the Main Page to your sidebar.

    2b - I would've liked to see a bit more wikification; there seem to be a number of references where a direct link would be very convenient; it shouldn't be difficult to change link colors if you don't want to have blue patches. This especially goes for references to historical & geographic entities (i.e. people, places, groups, etc.)

    3 - I like what you've done mechanics-wise; I would only suggest reorganizing the order in which you present some of the details (e.g. alphabetize or group like things together). For example, I would re-list the Called Shot Effects so that similar targets are together or at least in a regular pattern (e.g. arm, leg, hand, foot; arm, hand, foot, leg, etc.); also I'd start with the torso and finish with the head (for the readers' benefit).

    I don't have much more to say, except to reiterate just how well done this campaign is. In short, some minor re-organization, wikification, and local citation will go a long way. Did I mention that the style and graphics are awesome? Oh, don't re-cap the Main Page layout; it's fantastic the way it is - has a pseudo-authentic feel to it; the best mixture of authentism and pure creativity.

    Hope this helps!
    - Beaumains

    [EDIT]: I would also like to see some more imagery in places like the guides: a picture really is worth a thousand words, and will spur creativity and imagination in both you and your players to much greater heights and much quicker.
    Post edited by Beaumains on
  • wmoomaw
    wmoomaw
    Posts: 13 edited February 2012
    Hi all. would love to have a review of my site if anyone has the time!

    "Imperiums":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/imperiumandwyld

    Thanks!
    Post edited by wmoomaw on
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Review of Jaymes Bolton's "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history As always, just my opinion.
    It is not a secret I am a big fan of this site, so take that for what it is worth.

    *Start Page-* Good banner, great background- both inside and outside. Easily navigable sidebar. A really, really good start page. With the characters, I wish you gave backgrounds on those 1st summary pages. Also, Beaumains brings up a good point- for those not familiar with the grooveshark you may want to add a "press play for music" note.
    *Adventure Logs-* I think I have read all of your logs at one time or another, and the improvement is striking- in fact, that can be said for the whole of your site. You have come so far!!! I wish you would not write combat as round by round, make it more cinematic, but that is my only complaint. Good use of art, backgrounds, etc.
    *Wiki-* I agree with Beaumains- having main and home is confusing... You should drop one- everyone knows that the banner brings you back to the start page. 1st off, you should try your hand in the work-exchange "thread":http://forums.obsidianportal.com/comments.php?DiscussionID=2275&page=1 or just send those sites that you think get it right a pm. I see you have already alphabetized the called shots...
    The wiki is easy to navigate. While it is probably the least visually stimulating page of the main pages, it is easy. There is a whole lot, bunches, a wealth, etc. of info. I am a huge fan of the books of Rokugan personally, and how each book has a new internal background color, as do the different clans. Well Done!
    *Characters-* First note, wish people went to a clans page, and you had a separate section for the PC's, and another for NPC's... a lot of work, but I can dream.
    The Player Characters have either no bios or only a few sentences, and that is a shame. You have put in a lot of work on the site- get them to put in a little, and write their bios.
    *Overall-* This site has a lot of info, and the influences make it unique. You feel transported- and to me, that is what makes a good site. You need some cleanup work, and I think that Beaumains suggestion of a full acknowledgements page for your art is a good one (easy to keep up once you get caught up). Really good site overall!

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • arsheesh
    arsheesh
    Posts: 850
    Regarding "The Chronicles of Erdon":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/erdon

    I've just taken a stroll about your campaign site. I don't really have time to give you the kind of feedback that you requested (not that I've had time to review anyone's campaign for that matter), but I thought I'd throw in a couple of thoughts.

    First, I was not quite sure what to make of the "campaign series" section of the site. Are these campaigns which have gone before, or rather potential future campaigns which you intend to pursue at some point? After delving into these, and noticing that you don't currently have PC's listed under your "Characters" section, I inferred that the latter was the case. If so, then what a great idea! This would serve to both give PCs some options about just what kind of campaign they want to play in, and help to give you direction as to which part of your campaign setting to spend you time focusing on. If this is the case, then to avoid confusion you may want to make it a bit more clear at your site that these are "potential", rather than "previous" campaigns.

    Second, this may or may not be just me, but one of the first things I look for when checking out a new campaign setting, be it a published setting or one here at the portal, is a map of the world (or the region). This helps give my imagination something to work with and places the locations mentioned into some sort of coherent framework. In addition, when you are the one building a campaign it is incredibly helpful to have some sort of working map in order to get not only the geography right, but also to get a sense of the people, their culture and their history. Who is living at X now? Have they always been there and if not, when did they arrive? Did they have to vanquish another people group to establish their own at X, or did some natural disaster do it for them? Why did they travel to this place? Were they refugees fleeing from war within their homeland, or did some natural disaster force them to flee? How does the topography and climate affect the culture of the people (i.e. their agricultural rites and customs, the importance of trade, the clothes that they wear, their access to precious metals with which to craft valuable items as well as items of war). All of these question are much easier to answer if you have a good map in front of you to help focus you imagination. That said, before going any further down the road of developing your campaign setting, I'd recommend creating and uploading a world map (or at least a regional map). This will help you, your potential players, and visitors to your site get a lay of the land. If you don't know where to begin in creating a fantasy map, then the best place to start would be in visiting the "Cartographers Guild":http://forum.cartographersguild.com/index.php?referrerid=15127 there are some good discussions of what kind of software (including free to download software) is out there, as well as tutorials to help you get started. Best of all, the Guild is a wonderful community of people that will give you feedback and constructive criticism on your map, as you build it.

    Anyway, other than that, looks like you are off to a good start.

    Cheers,
    -Arsheesh
  • JaymesBolton
    JaymesBolton
    Posts: 278 edited February 2012
    Beaumains: Thank you for your feedback and thank you for your kind words! L5R was originally a card game and then became an RPG in the late 90s. It is a combination of Japanese, Chinese, Mongolian and Pacific Islands mythos, geography and culture. Because of this it makes referencing specific things a little difficult at times. Most of my information came from either the L5R wiki or the books. For the music part groveshark sometimes takes a bit to load and you have to hit play to make it actually start (which is a good thing in my opinion cause I personally hate going to site and being blasted by music or a video unexpectedly). Could you explain to me what you mean by citations and show me an example campaign that does it?

    Killervp: Thank you for your feedback and your encouragement. When you mention deleting the "main page" you mean the link in the navigation sidebar? (and oh god do i really have to edit the code on each page again?...that makes me want to cry!) I do not want to put a reminder to hit play for groveshark cause it is just there for a maybe and not a real mandatory part of the intro site. As for having a wikied characters page maybe in the future at some point once I drag my players kicking and screaming into being more active on the site. Ad for the work exchange I don't really know if I have any trade-able skills to offer besides google-fu and insomniac time availability. As for the art aknolwedgements I have basically just typed in search parameters to google images and used the pictures (as I note in my acknowledgements page) and I have no idea how I could now trace the pictures back to their original locations.

    As for the character backgrounds and player contribution to the site this takes some explaining. My group is much more slaptstick and plays like a over the top late 80s Stalonne movie when it comes to most RPGs. I wanted a change of pace a bit from our other games and have had a love for L5R ever since I had played a Rokugan samurai in one our D&D games. L5R is a very serious and controlled RPG and it has taken them some getting used to ( I still have to fight them sometimes on this). It also has a massive amount of relevant information that they are just now finally starting to read (after 8 months of gameplay). Because of all the "homework" I have given them already (and yes they call it that sometimes) they have been reluctant to work on the site or their character information. I have finally started to get them to do so and hopefully in the future I can give more relevant information on the compilation sites and move all the characters to a wiki instead of using the characters tab.

    Thank you both for your encouragement and criticism. Hopefully I can make a better site using it.

    -Jaymes

    "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history
    Post edited by JaymesBolton on
  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132 edited February 2012
    Arsheesh! Thanks for your valuable feedback; I was just thinking about revamping the main page the other day, and will gladly take your suggestion! I also thank you for the Cartographer link; I've actually been aware of them for some time, but wanted to be able to compensate someone for their work (I intend to be rather demanding and burdensome), which I'm currently unable to do (hence my yet-to-be-ascendent status). Fear not, however, I do have a rough working map in mind, which is admittedly still under development, and have (and will continue to) take into account all of these things you've mentioned (and more); I also have special plans for how I want to implement that (semi-pseudo-diabolical laugh; j/k). Thanks Again! Oh, I'll be referencing this dialogue (regarding Erdon) "here":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/erdon/comments, if that's alright with you.

    Jaymes: I can understand what you mean about referencing; it's hard enough to find just the right art & style. Perhaps an example would help: Savannah did an excellent job with what I'm talking about, though her setting is quite different: note the "epigraph":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/ageofworms-ap. Here's another "example":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/city-of-dreadful-night I recently stumbled across. The idea is simply that you know where these bits of text come from. An image is easy enough to identify at a glance, but if one merely lists an influential author, and not a specific text, and dissociates the author from the text, it's hard for a reader to figure out where to go if they want to read more. But I'm assuming that you've referenced specific works in Asian literature. While the examples presented are ideal, it would be great just to see a list of influential authors, even if you haven't directly quoted anybody. The "homework" you gave your players might be the sort of thing I'm looking for (but then, I'm weird that way). I saw that under "Outside Reference" you have a sub-topic for books and another for media; perhaps that's what I'm looking for. Also, I did try clicking on the Grooveshark button, but to no avail (also retried just now to be sure); it seems to be perpetually loading. For reference, I'm using IE 9 with the most recent (stable) updates. If you can get that working; and maybe mask it with a "click for sound" icon, that could catapult you into the top tier of campaigns (imo).

    -Beaumains
    Post edited by Beaumains on
  • JaymesBolton
    JaymesBolton
    Posts: 278
    ahhh I see the confusion now. Almost all the information posted is fictional in nature, some of it written by fictional authors (like Akodo or Kakita in my Books of Rokugan section) with a few exceptions of some of the martial arts. Legend of the Five Rings is a absolutely magnificent setting that has been constantly growing and evolving over the last 15 years. The outside reference books and media part is a compilation of real books and media that could be used as a general reference to the society and historical era that Rokugan (the name of the Empire in L5R) represents. If you want to learn more I suggest visiting the "L5R Wiki":http://l5r.wikia.com/wiki/Main_Page for more information on the L5R system and Rokugan fluff. It has a interesting real history as well since it was first owned by AEG then bought by Wizards of the Coast and then back by AEG with a total of 4 editions out at this time each one adding to the history and dynamics of Rokugan society. I love the "click for sound" icon idea by the way and will try to fix that this week.


    -Jaymes

    "Changing History":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/l5r-changing-history
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Yes, Jaymes, unfortunately I was saying delete that, and that means every page.... I am currently about halfway on doing something similar, but even more nitpicky... Magavendon noted that on my nav bar the order was campaigns, regions, performers- but on some of my sidebars it said campaigns, performers, regions.... ugghh
    You also have it right on the images- go back and do it again to credit, if you wish. I was, like Beaumains, also interested in the writing.
    Lastly, on the work exchange- we all would love help.... you would be surprised.
    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132 edited February 2012
    Reminder to the regulars that the following campaigns were offered for review:

    * "Imperium":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/imperiumandwyld

    * "Tales of the Empire":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/tales_of_the_empire_sac

    If I have time I'll browse through them this weekend, but no guarantees.




    Jaymes: in the case where you quote fictitious authors, it would be good to cite them formally, if only so that readers can make that connection. In fact, I would also, in such cases, create a link to a page about the fictitious authors, or if you didn't create the authors, then a link to the pre-existing work (or standard reference thereto) would work.

    For example:

    "insert really awesome and fitting excerpt from fictitious author here" - [[Fictitious Author]]

    - or -

    "insert really awesome and fitting excerpt from fictitious author here" - [[sourcebook link | Fictitious Author]]

    - or -

    "insert really awesome and fitting excerpt from fictitious author here" - "Fictitious Author": [direct L5R wiki link]


    The forums are being kind enough to show the code, but it should look normal in your wiki.

    - Beaumains

    [EDIT]: that last option should be the standard off-site link style, and should read [insert ... here].
    Post edited by Beaumains on
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Review of Wmoomaw's "Imperium":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/imperiumandwyld As always, just my opinion.

    Start Page- My first thought was is it Imperium or Imperiums, since there are basically 2 banners on the start page, one after the other, one with plural, one without. I actually think the scroll banner is a better banner than the one you use. You should use the pics as the links, rather than have the pics above, and the links below. There are many examples of this throughout OP- or just hit me with a pm.
    Adventure Logs- The logs are confusing. There are 2 logs, then a compendium of 40+ logs, then another log, then a couple of clickable logs, then another log. Settle on a style, and stick with it!
    Wiki- While the red leather appears pink to me (not my 1st choice) I love the concept of the changing background. (Note, I like the Tuatha background). I would change the name of Wiki to Home, and complete the unfinished main links. (such as new creatures, fusang, etc.) I would highly, highly recommend either a sidebar and/or a navbar.
    Overall- There is a lot of good info here, but the presentation is haphazard. Make it consistent and you will be in much better shape. I really like the changing backgrounds representing different kingdoms, and some of the logs are really good- but it is very hard to find them because of the inconsistencies.

    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • wmoomaw
    wmoomaw
    Posts: 13 edited February 2012
    Thanks for the review! Glad to see you bring up the points that i was wondering about myself. Ive been trying to figure out how to work the logs aspect. i used to have this site somewhere else and had a page where all the players in my group could contribute by writing their own log. One reason for this was one player does a great job of writing log entries, but while they were entertaining they were from the perspective of his character and they other players wanted to show the campaign from there viewpoint in order to achieve a more "balanced view" of what was going on. So in short (i know, too late) i have six different peoples logs and I have not been able to find a good way to allow people to update their own logs while using the "Adventure log" tab. does anyone have any ideas on how to better approach the logs so that the players individual log are able to stay together?

    Thanks for the comments on my backgrounds. I had to start doing that in order to also help me. on my old site i had 600+wiki pages of info and in order to help keep them straight i added the color backgrounds. i've been having a hell of a time finding good backgrounds that were distinct from each other yet whose details and colors did not cause text to become unreadable.

    I've been wanting to add a navbar, there is a lot of what i consider to be the "good stuff" on the site that is just buried in there and so its hard to find. I think a navbar could help that stuff see the light of day, but as this is my first attempt at any kind of coding (obviously) I wasn't sure what the best way to go about generating one. Any recommendations on some good navbar code?

    I really appreciate your review and would love any advice out there for how to best adjust these issues. Thanks!
    Post edited by wmoomaw on
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876 edited February 2012
    First off, this site is the 1st time a lot of us have coded, so know you are not alone. It was my 1st time when I joined almost 1 year ago, and now I pretend to know what I am doing pretty well....
    On the logs, set it up by player. If you go navbar, this is really not hard. I have it set up by "chronological":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/a-god-rebuilt/wikis/campaigns and the option to do by "player":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/a-god-rebuilt/wikis/character-logs on my site.
    I hear you on the backgrounds- and only the red did I not like, the others were awesome. Someone in a review said they did not like my yellow parchment, so don't take it as awful or a real big deal- just a personal preference ( I have 8 different backgrounds, 1 for each of my pcs)
    On the navbar, and all things, there are 2 places I go. One to the master, Arsheesh, whose navbar most of us have stolen, with permission. Link is "here":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/age-of-legends/wikis/html-templates-for-age-of-legends
    The place I go also on a regular basis, even now, is to the great Chainsaw FAQ (Chainsaw is also great himself- he manages the dynamic sheets, and has shared more code than probably anyone on OP). The FAQ is "here":http://forums.obsidianportal.com/comments.php?DiscussionID=1114&page=1
    Lastly, if there is something that you like, just PM the gm of the site- almost everyone will share here- really great people. I have stolen from at least 6 people myself that I have acknowledgements on my site.
    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011
    Post edited by GamingMegaverse on

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132
    Regarding "Tales of the Empire":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/tales_of_the_empire_sac

    I'll try to stick to what you asked for; and I'd say that the overall organization is pretty good; it's direct and straightforward: stick with it. One thing I'd consider adding, would be a page-to-page nav system, so that readers don't have to go all the way back to the main page every time. This can be as simple as a "back" link, or something more elaborate.

    Other than that actually, it's pretty well done from where I stand. It's bare-bones, but that actually kind of suits it. Just finish filling in the blanks (i.e. "TEXT" blocks), double check for spelling/grammar errors (or better yet, have your players do it), and it should be good to go. It won't be anything too fancy, but that's not necessarily bad; and it's a good site nonetheless.

    Hope that helps!
    -Beaumains
  • BraulioB
    BraulioB
    Posts: 4
    I am thinking of entering the campaign I am currently playing into the running for Campaign Of The Month, but first I would appreciate it if you'd tell me what you guys think of it.

    Please review this campaign.
    "Serpent's Skull In Eberron":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaign/serpents-skull-eberron/wikis/home-page
  • Beaumains
    Beaumains
    Posts: 132 edited March 2012
    Regarding "Serpent's Skull in Eberron":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/serpents-skull-eberron

    First off, it feels very ... Eberron, in the writing on the Home Page (i.e. intro) at least, which is good. That style doesn't need to be kept persistently, but insofar as the style is non-encyclopedic but casual, the site should be consistent, and the intro wording looks good in that regard. However, there isn't a fluid transition to the main wiki, and niether is there a fluid transition to the characters, which is important for a campaign site of this type (and pretty much for any campaign seeking COTM status). Now, because these links are built into the site, a fluid transition shouldn't be required, but it should certainly help. Now, if you weren't using the wiki, character page, etc. then you'd actually want to cut it out; but you are using them, so I recommend providing a natural transition to them. They don't both have to be from the Home Page, but at least a Main Page link would be an improvement on the Home Page - perhaps the next-to-final link (i.e. "Racing to Ruin")? Speaking of the Main Page; the cyclic link is completely redundant and unnecessary.

    Second, the imagery is good, and I like the map being posted up front, but the map should also go under the maps tab, so that visitors can get a better look at it. The Home Page also has a redundant link to Yarzoth's Notes, which is a map that has no given context. Pretty much everything that can have text, should have at least some; even if it's just a single line saying "This is a [insert choice noun] about which nothing is known," but ideally everything that is known (or could be known, depending on the GM), should be present. Of course, the map issue seems to be pretty common, but the GM is an Ascendant member, so there shouldn't be a limit on the maps.

    Third, the campaign calendar / calendar of events is definitely a good addition, but it could be clearer, and seems to overlap with the Adventure Log to the point of redundancy. Both of these are fairly well developed, which is excellent (though alas, I havent' the time to read hardly any of it)! I would suggest including some sort of means by which to distinguish between perspectives, whether viewing the parts individually or in sequence (as in the Log). Oh, naturally character perspectives need not match the narrator's perspective, but the narrator's perspective should remain consistent, insofar as possible, to avoid confusion and help maintain the setting.

    Fourth, I like the Shipwrecked page, and the level of attention that has obviously been put into the game, which that represents.

    Fifth: organization. Honestly, this is where the campaign hurts most. I like the maps, the logs, the details, all of that, but it's harder to get around the campaign and find things than it should be. This is compounded by redundancy. A great example is the Stormreach page. The Xen'Drik page is linked every single time, exactly the same way to the ultimate redundancy; once is enough, the first time. Simultaneously this page fails to link to other potential 'curiosities,' such as Skyfall Peninsula, the Dragonmarked Houses, Galifar, the Last War, etc. Granted, these things may be familiar to Eberron players, but even those who are all-but-perfectly-familiar with Eberron might want to quickly hop over to one of these pages, especially to see how that information might reflect on the current page. The principle applies in general. There's also an odd link here that has virtually no preface or explanation. Furthermore, to anyone who doesn't +speak+ Eberron fluently, the "Campaign Information" section on the Main Page might as well be Middle English. A visitor (or even player) would have to already know what they're looking for before coming to the site, and then there's no guarantee of them finding it. There's no clear rhyme or reason to the order of links - except that like things are together; but you wouldn't necessarily know that looking at the page.

    Final thoughts: if you really want this campaign to get COTM, then I strongly recommend looking at the previous "COTMs":http://forums.obsidianportal.com/comments.php?DiscussionID=1803&page=1 - Duskreign also has a COTM system that I'd recommend checking out. Be sure the DM is on board, and ideally all of the players too. This campaign definitely has potential, but organization is key.

    Hope this helps!
    -Beaumains
    Post edited by Beaumains on
  • GamingMegaverse
    GamingMegaverse
    Posts: 2,876
    Beaumains, Duskreign picks his own campaign of the month. Arsheesh has listed the recent winners in this forum "thread":http://forums.obsidianportal.com/comments.php?DiscussionID=1803&page=1 Thanks again for the excellent reviews.
    killervp
    "A God...Rebuilt":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/a-god-rebuilt
    "Duskreign's First Ever COTM":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/wyrmshadow/wiki_pages/112011

    Just trying to help out.  Changed name from killervp to Gaming Megaverse to match other sites.

  • Edward_D
    Edward_D
    Posts: 7
    Beaumains, thanks for the review.

    How would I add a way to go back to the nav box I use at the bottom?
  • BraulioB
    BraulioB
    Posts: 4
    Beaumains, thanks for giving my campaign a quick review. All suggestions are good points and I'm going to work on them.
  • magavendon
    magavendon
    Posts: 112
    Eh, I'm probably never going to get around to making my site better unless someone -tells me what to do- gives me some suggestions. So if someone would review my site "Progression into the Stars":http://www.obsidianportal.com/campaigns/progression-into-the-stars that would be awesome.
Sign In or Register to comment.

Stand against the Overlords with November's Campaign of the Month, Hazard Pay!

Read the feature post on the blog!
Or return to Obsidian Portal!

Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Discussions